


If You Give McCoy a Hypo

by grapalicious



Series: If You Give... [2]
Category: Star Trek, Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies), Star Trek: The Original Series
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-09-06
Updated: 2013-09-06
Packaged: 2017-12-25 20:37:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 323
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/957360
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/grapalicious/pseuds/grapalicious
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dr. McCoy and his hyposprays. A dangerous combination.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>  <i> "If you give McCoy a hypo, he'll need a patient to go with it..."</i></p>
            </blockquote>





	If You Give McCoy a Hypo

**Author's Note:**

> Transferred from my fanfiction account [NineKindsofCrazy](http://www.fanfiction.net/u/2323591/NineKindsofCrazy)
> 
>  
> 
> Work inspired by Laura Numeroff's book series for kids. Pokes fun at The Original Series episodes as well as Original Series and Alternate Series Doctor McCoy.

If you give McCoy a hypo, he'll need a patient to go with it.

"Ow, Bones!"

"Quit your crying."

But, McCoy's patient will be unlikely to cooperate.

"Where on earth do you think you're going?"

"I have to get back to the bridge."

There will, almost certainly, be an unexpected complication.

"Do you hear some kind of high pitched ringing?"

"It's a side affect!"

This will probably be followed by an even larger unexpected complication.

"Captain, an unknown ship has appeared and they are targeting their phasers on us."

"Red alert!"

Annoyed, McCoy will start to get snarky.

"Doctor McCoy, don't you think you should return to sickbay?"

"Keep talking and we'll see which one of us is gonna need to be in sickbay."

Someone, most likely a poor red-shirted Ensign, will be killed in an attack on the ship.

"Is there anything you can do, Doctor?"

"No. He's dead, Jim."

After that, McCoy will feel the need to argue, illogically, about emotions.

"Of course they're not acting logically, you green-blooded hobgoblin! They're acting out of anger!"

"A reaction, Doctor, I am sure you are quite familiar with."

McCoy will be asked to do a job outside his area of expertise.

"Bones, I need you to help Spock. See if you can find a way to intercept their weapons system."

"Jim, I'm a doctor, not a computer hacker!"

But McCoy will most likely succeed and then proceed to feel smug about it.

"Bet you didn't think I knew how to work any of those logical machines, did you?"

"I did have my doubts, Doctor."

During the climactic action, someone will inevitably get hurt.

"Let me take a look at that."

"It's just bruised. It's not as bad as it looks."

McCoy will head back to sickbay, where his hypos await.

"Ow! Bones!"

"I don't want to hear it."

Because if you give McCoy a patient, he has a hypo to go with it.


End file.
